This Hack Will Up Your Hot Springs Game

April 11, 2023

For centuries, humans have been trying to upstage the humble hot spring. First, we invented the bath. And then we invented hot tubs. However, neither of these inventions could surpass what nature has given us.

First off, baths don’t magically get filled with warm water. Which, not to be melodramatic, can be a tortuous experience. Meanwhile, springs just don’t have this problem. You can quickly put on your swimmers and steam yourself in.

However, what about the mechanical hot tub? Surely, they’re better than a pithy hot spring. Well, hot tubs have become synonymous with being soups of dead skin, DILF bacteria, and a smattering of post coital sweat. What’s more, there’s just no way that the hot tub can recover from this image.

Hot springs, on the other hand, have some mint branding. They’re synonymous with nymphs, purity, and cleansing one’s very soul.

Therefore, springs are just better. If this was The Great British Bake Off, Mr Bath and Mr Hot Tub wouldn’t have even made it into the tent.

However, while hot springs slap, I still believe that they can be improved. Like all things, they don’t have to stagnate. We can still bring these springs into the 21st century.

So, with this info set in stone, here’s a proposal to up your hot springs game. Enjoy.

How to Make Fondue in Hot Springs

A person relaxing in a hot spring. — Image: Getty

As we’ve already established, sitting in a spring can be a transcendent experience. But what about sitting in a hot spring with a bowl of chocolate fondue? Well, that might be transcendent-and-a-half.

Additionally, obtaining this upgrade is a super simple thing to do. All you’ll need is a hot spring, a microwave safe bowl, some A+ cooking chocolate, and a spoon.

The steps for success are as follows:

Put your chocolate in the metal bowl.
Go into the hot spring with your bowl and spoon.
Make sure to keep your spoon hand dry.
Balance your bowl in the water.
Use your spoon to mix the chocolate.
Once your chocolate has melted, nom nom away!

Now, it’s worth noting that some hot springs won’t allow you to eat in them. So make sure to be a good boy, girl, or enby. Go through a spring’s rules before doing this hack. Please, and thank you.

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