Though we may use our phones to match with lovers and maintain romantic connections, when it actually comes to having sex with these people, our phones could be doing us dirty.
A new study from Durham University finds people would rather spend time on their devices than have sex with their partners. In fact, 40% of the couples surveyed admitted they’ve delayed sex to instead hang out on their phones, while some said they have raced through sex to get back to their phones afterwards.
One-third of those who took part even said they’d paused or stopped mid-sex to answer a phone call, which isn’t super romantic.
The findings are backed up by another survey from the Sheikh Khalifa Ben Zayed Al-Nahyane Hospital in Morocco, which found that 60% of respondents were experiencing dissatisfaction in their “sexual performances” due to their smartphones.
In that survey, 92% admitted to using their phones at night while only 18% of people ever turned theirs on airplane mode in the bedroom.
Almost 75% of people said they sleep with their phones either on their person or next to their beds at night, and those who keep the phones close confessed to feeling fearful or anxious when detached from the device.
Of course, we now know this feeling to be nomophobia (no mobile phone phobia). The term coined by Monash University refers to the feelings of fear we experience when we find ourselves away from our phones.
According to a study, 99.2% of mobile phone users have some fear of being without their phone, and 13.2% of the population are suffering from severe nomophobia – leading to an increased risk of dependence and dangerous use.
So what’s the solution? While not what the phone addict wants to hear, learning to switch off is important for maintaining both one’s mood and mental health, but also a sense of presence with our partners.
Whether you both make a decision to switch off after 8.00pm or at least have an hour of no screen time when you hop into bed, the benefits to your intimacy and sleep are well worth the momentary panics of being without your device.
Over time, you may even find those feelings start to slip away entirely.
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